Sunday, February 8, 2015
Hello! So you all were awesome and gave me some great questions for Zayla's interview... and I finally got her to answer them!
If you don't know her, she's one of the four main characters in my book The Resistance Chronicles, and you can find out a bit more about her here. This is my first interview with a character, so bear with me.
But it's gonna be fun.
Zayla: *cocks an eyebrow*
Hi there! So you ready for this?
Okay then! First Question. have you always suffered from social anxiety?
Zayla: "Way to start out easy." *fidgets with sweater*
It's okay, they only asked because they like you.
Zayla: "Fine. Kind of. I mean, I never was good at making friends. No one ever liked me, either. But when the panic attacks started--" *runs hand through hair, sucks in a breath*
It's okay. How old were you then?
Zayla: "I was twelve when I had my first attack. My dad thought I was being dramatic. My mom thought I would grow out of it. Kids-- the ones that said they were my friends-- didn't get it. They thought I was crazy."
You're not though.
Zayla: *oh really? face*
So how does the anxiety and panic disorder affect your ability to make friends?
Zaya: "I don't make friends. The only reason I have friends now is because they cornered me and forced me into it."
But you like them.
Zayla: "They don't hate me yet. So yeah, I do."
Is it harder depending on the person? Like, if it's a boy, is that easier or harder than a girl? Or is it mostly a personality thing?
Zayla: "Well, with Cameron it was easy. He did all the work. And I think the thing about guys is that they can't directly compare themselves with me. Like with Alyssa-- she's a girl too. And she can do anything, and do it well. So with her it's harder, cause I know she's judging me, even if she doesn't say it."
Well.... we'll just move on.
What sort of things make you panic?
Zayla: "it depends. Sometimes I get an attack over stuff most people just stress out over. And once it starts, it's too hard to fight off. If I get overwhelmed, I panic. If I get stressed out, I panic. If someone starts talking to me and I can't figure out what they're thinking, I panic."
Does it have anything to do with feeling as though you do not have control of a situation?
Zayla: "You know that answer. And since you do, I find it cruel that you stuck me in here and forced me to talk. Do you even realize how-- how hard--" *hands are slightly shaking*
I'm sorry! It seemed like a good idea....
Okay, Let's do something you like talking about. What's the story behind you having a falcon?
Zayla: "Oh. Well, there was always something about the birds that drew me. They got to see parts of the world I'd never know.
And one day, I was coming out of a panic attack in an alley, and there she was. just a fledgling then. She must have escaped from a breeder-- but I didn't care. She needed my help. And to be honest, I needed hers."
You two make a good team. Now, how did Ferucil's control affect you having a pet? Does he decide who keeps pets and who doesn't?
Zayla: "Well, it's like this. Ferucil decides on your career, and day to day assignments, basically other than that he commands you on whim. So as long as he doesn't restrict you, you can keep a pet. So he decided the breeder would raise raptors, proably for rodent control. Then he didn't tell me to get ridd of the bird when I found her."
I see. Okay, so another question you won't appreciate. what scares you the most about being part of the Resistance? have you ever had to kill someone or something?
Zayla: *staring at the ground* "I'm terrified I'll mess this all up. I don't understand it. And it's all happening really fast. But it's like instinct-- i know this is where I'm supposed to be."...."And yes"
So? Tell us about it.
Zayla: "Fine. In Thera, parent's tell their kids stories about an army of creatures Ferucil keeps outside the city to protect us from bad people. They're just supposed to be fairy tales. But the creatures are very real, and the attack us.
So yeah, I've been attacked, and I fought back."
Yes, yes you did.
Zayla: "I almost lost."
That means you won.
So what kind of creatures do you see?
Zayla: *bites lip* Um-- well, when they attacked the Resistance headquarters, I saw a couple different kinds. One of them went after Cameron-- he called it a Keraguan, I think. It was short and slow, but strong and-- hideous. Like nothing I'd ever imagined.
But the Strach is what came after me. It's like-- like a-- like a dragon. But no wings. And six legs. And the skin is coated in poison. It touched me here. *pulls up sleeve, there's burn marks on her forearm*
Is that the one that scares you most?
Zayla: *sighs, pulls sleeve back down* Cameron said that Ferucil sends the same kind of creature after you almost every time. The one that can do the most damage to you.
So yeah, It's just a little bit scary.
I can imagine. But Ferucils creatures aren't the only threat, are they?
Zayla: *shakes head*
How do criminals like the ones that attacked Alyssa exist in Thera, with Ferucil controlling everyone's actions?
Zayla: You'd think Ferucils control would eliminate, crime, wouldn't you? But he lets them... he /lets/ them stay out past curfew, he lets them-- *stutters, furrows brow* I don't know. I don't understand it.
Okay, two more and you can go home. Is the Resistance tolerant of your panic disorder, or do they get annoyed by it.
Zayla: "Well, they act like they're tolerant. But I don't know how long that will last. I think Cameron might be the only person who really tries to understand it." *shrugs* "Not that he ever will, but it's something, I guess."
Do you have anything special you think about to calm yourself down when you panic?
Zayla: *smiles faintly* "Now that i'm a Recruit-- when I panic, Adiano speaks to me. So I do my best to ignore everything else that's making me panic and just listen to Him. It doesn't make the panic go away immediately, but it helps a little." *shifts in her seat* "That's it then? I can go?"
Yes. Thank you for being cooperative.
Zayla: "Sure. Bye." *runs off*
Yay! That was so much fun, and helped me beat writer's block.... I finally have a draft of the next part! It will still be a while before it's ready, but I'm working on getting the whole story kinda mapped out. I hope you guys will like it. :D
Thanks for reading! (and asking questions)